Infidelity

Personality plays a role in infidelity

By Truth About Deception

New research shows that personality differences play a role in determining who is likely to cheat on a partner.

There are several interesting things about the findings. Psychopathy (lack of empathy for others) and Machiavellianism (lacking emotions and being manipulative in nature) are both linked to infidelity. However, there are some interesting sex differences at play.

“Among women, however, only psychopathy and Machiavellianism were unique predictors of infidelity, whereas only psychopathy uniquely predicted infidelity among men. However, infidelity committed by psychopathic individuals led to relationship dissolution, whereas infidelity committed by Machiavellian individuals did not.”

In short, men, who lack empathy and concerns for others, are more likely to cheat and not be concerned about the consequences that follow. Women, who are manipulative and emotionally aloof, are also more likely to cheat, but probably attempt to cover their infidelity better than psychopathic men.

It is always good to get to know the person you are dealing with before becoming romantically involved.

Source:  Jones, D. N., & Weiser, D. A. (2014). Differential infidelity patterns among the Dark Triad. Personality and Individual Differences, 57, 20-24.

 


Don’t poach a mate

By Truth About Deception

New research on mate poaching, that is successfully stealing someone else’s partner, is not the wisest way to start a new relationship.

Individuals, who left a partner to be with someone else, tend not to be very happy in their new relationships.

Poached individuals turn out to be less happy and less invested in their new relationships compared to couples where mate poaching did not occur.

Poached individuals are also more likely to commit infidelity and be on the look out for a better partner to come along.

Other key findings of this research

“To summarize, the results of the present analysis suggest that individuals who were successfully mate poached by their current partners tend to be socially passive, not particularly nice to others, careless and irresponsible, and narcissistic. They also tend to desire and engage in sexual behavior outside of the confines of committed relationships.”

Stealing a mate from someone else is probably not the best way to find love and happiness.

Source:  Foster, J. D., Jonason, P. K., Shrira, I., Keith Campbell, W., Shiverdecker, L. K., & Varner, S. C. (2014). What Do You Get When You Make Somebody Else’s Partner Your Own? An Analysis of Relationships Formed Via Mate Poaching. Journal of Research in Personality.

 


Innate Desires

By Truth About Deception

Is it natural for humans to be monogamous?

Perhaps this is one of the world’s oldest questions, especially considering that prostitution is considered to be the world’s oldest profession.

For decades researchers have been exploring if humans, by nature, are meant to be monogamous. No one questions that some individuals can successfully practice monogamy. Just as humans are omnivores by design, some people faithfully lead a vegetarian lifestyle.

The real question for scholars is not what people can practice, but what are our natural inclinations. The evidence overwhelmingly suggests that individuals desire multiple sexual partners. Even a casual observation of human behavior suggests that people like entertaining the idea of having sex with someone outside of a committed relationship. If people were naturally inclined to only want to have sex with one person, how do you explain that at least 70 million copies of Fifty Shades of Grey have been purchased and pornography is a multibillion-dollar industry? Certainly, a monogamous mind would not create such a large market for such erotically based works.

The evidence against monogamy does not only involve what happens in our minds, but our bodies reveal cues to our sexual desires as well. Sexual dimorphism – physical size differences between men and women – are a reliable indicator of sexual behavior. In related species where males and females are similar in size, pair-bonding is more common. Larger physical differences between males and females often correspond to less monogamous sexual behavior. A new article in theWall Street Journal does a good job of highlighting the findings of sexual dimorphism as it relates to humans:

“So by these various biological measures, are humans a pair-bonding or a tournament species? Neither. Across populations, men are roughly 10% taller and 20% heavier than women, need 20% more calories and live 6% shorter—more sexually dimorphic than monogamous species, less than polygamous species. Moreover, compared with, say, monogamous gibbons, human males have bigger testes and higher sperm counts…but pale in comparison to polygamous chimps. Measure after measure, it’s the same.

It turns out that we aren’t monogamous or polygamous by nature. As everyone from poets to divorce attorneys can attest, we are by nature a profoundly confused species—somewhere in between.”

 


Cheating Better Than Divorce

By Truth About Deception

In the best of circumstances, any marriage can be difficult to manage.  Two individuals working to create a life together is a complicated task, no matter how you look at it.

Sex is one of the many issues that can cause tension in a romantic relationship.  While passion helps bring couples together, it typically fades with time.

How do you keep your sex life novel and interesting, especially when two individuals needs and desires change in different ways?

Dan Savage, author of a new book called, American Savage, argues that in some instances cheating is better than divorce.  A quote and video of Dan Savage making his case:

“If one person is completely done with sex and the other person is not done with sex, what do you advise people to do in that circumstance? Divorce? Traumatize their children?” he said. “I look at that and I say ‘You know, do what you need to do to stay married and stay sane. And maybe that involves cheating, but as the lesser of two evils. Divorce is an evil, cheating is an evil, there are circumstances in which cheating is the lesser evil.”

 


Show Me Your Hand II

By Truth About Deception

Previous research shows that men, whose ring finger is longer than their index finger (on their right hand), experienced a surge of testosterone while in their mother’s womb.

A lot of masculine traits such as risk taking, aggression, and athletic skills have been linked to such differences in finger length (also called 2D:4D digit ratio).

New research shows that men with longer ring fingers compared to their index fingers are also more likely to confront a romantic rival when jealous.

Modern day palm reading?  Not really.  Just science exploring how heighten levels of testosterone influence physiological traits as well as aggressive behavior.